This is Me

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Monday, November 13, 2006

I Will Boycott You In A Heartbeat

As I'm listening to Janet's new album last night (which is really good, by the way), my mind wanders to the Superbowl Wardrobe Malfunction debacle and how differently she was treated than Justin Timberlake.

Justin's videos are in constant rotation on MTV but Jackson's fans had to stage a freakin' protest just to get one video on the air. To me, this type of attitude/behavior shows the lack of respect for women the world has. It was the classic "It's always the woman's fault" syndrome that people fall victim to, as if men don't have control over their own actions.

(For example, a woman gets raped and someone says "Well, if she wasn't wearing that short skirt...". Or a teenage boy gets a girl pregnant and the girl is the one who is called *fast*. Or a married man hits on an unsuspecting woman, and the wife gets mad at the woman INSTEAD OF her husband. WTH? Why are women always to blame?)

Now Justin's album is HOT (a friend of mine played it while I was in her car), but no matter how hot the songs are, I can't bring myself to spend money on it. After he told the media "it was all her idea", I lost all respect for him and refuse to support him in any way. He lost me as a fan. Even if it was her idea, he could have said no. He's a grown man. Both of them were involved in the incident, yet she is the only one suffering the consequences.

Yes, I am boycotting Justin Timberlake. I may be the only one, but that's okay. I feel good about myself for not supporting a man who doesn't take responsibility for his own part. (I am quick to boycott someone if I don't agree with his or her actions.)

Me thinking about boycotting him got me to thinking about other people I boycott (see how my mind wanders?).

I boycott Usher ever since he admitted to cheating on his girlfriend and am no longer a fan of Michael Jordan because he cheated on his wife. When I told someone that I don't buy Usher's music, she asked me...

"What does him cheating on Chili have to do with you?"

Everything. I'm a woman and he disrespected a woman. Why can't I be offended?

If he disrespects a woman, he disrespects me, and I will no longer support him after being disrespected.

Cheating is disrespectful. PERIOD.

No, they didn't cheat on me, BUT......

Let me ask you a question.

If you are Black, and you hear about someone calling another Black person a nigger, do you get upset?

Of course you do.

No, the person didn't call YOU a nigger, but you're Black, so you get offended.

If you are Jewish, and someone spits an anti-Semitic slur to someone, do you get offended?

Of course you do.

The person didn't hurl the slur at YOU specifically, but you're Jewish, so you get offended.

Why can't women do the same thing?

If a man disrespects one woman (by cheating on her, calling her a b!tch, whatever), why WOULDN'T you get offended? And what makes you think he won't disrespect you?

Would you date a man who has physically beaten another woman? He may not beat you. But he did beat someone......

Some may say that being called a racial slur is a lot worse than being cheated on, but is it worse because we don't hold females in high esteem? Is it because cheating *happens all the time* that causes us to become indifferent to it? Feel like it's not as important? Why does disrespecting a person because of his or her race hold more weight than disrespecting a woman? (Kinda like that "One sin isn't greater than the other" thing.) Yes, racists hate us BECAUSE we're Black. Usher or Michael didn't disrespect their girlfriend/wife BECAUSE they were women, but there are some men who have no respect FOR ANY WOMAN and cheat in every relationship. There is no excuse for cheating. If you're THAT unhappy in a relationship, leave. Whether you cheat once or cheat all the time, it doesn't change the fact that you cheated. (I mean, whether you murder once or are a serial murderer, you're STILL a murderer.)

How people act in their previous relationships and in their everyday lives SHOULD give you an insight into their character, and someone's character is the FOUNDATION of who he is.

*I'm not angry* at Justin Timberlake or Usher or my best friend's ex-boyfriend who cheated on her or WHOMEVER is on my boycotting list. Life's too short to walk around holding grudges. I may have gotten upset in the beginning, but I let it go and become indifferent. But that doesn't mean I'm going to remain a fan.... Why would I?


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