This is Me

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Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Looking For What Exactly?

Folks who know me know my dreams are weird. But the one I had last night really has me saying "hmmm...."

The beginning is a little hazy; I just vaguely remember a crowded freeway full of stopped cars and I was walking around to each car looking inside for someone....

Scene 2: I was in the room with a bunch of kids of different ages. We're all having a good time when all of a sudden someone disappears. Then this guy I'm with says "You mean to tell me that if I let go of you, you'll disappear? Don't ever let go of me ever." And then we start to hug.... (after waking up I'm wondering who that guy was because he didn't resemble any of my ex-boyfriends.....). So we spend time trying to walk here and there without letting go of each other, but then we stop and start dancing. I look over to a young girl next to me and she stops dancing, closes her eyes, and faints, but when her body hits the ground she disappears and the only thing left is her dress. I bend down, grab her dress, and start screaming "She disappeared!" So for some reason we start grabbing each other's clothes in hopes that they won't disappear and I've got a whole lot of bras in my hand (including the bra my mom bought me last week that we took back because it was too big). I'm holding on to these bras for dear life (when I wake up my hand is cramping from trying to hold on to those non-existent bras). I really have to use the restroom, but I'm afraid to let go of the bras, so I run to the bathroom and open the door, take my pants down, etc., using only my right hand. As I'm sitting on the toilet, the scene changes to another room of the house.

Scene 3: In this room a guy who plays Spencer Truman on the soap opera One Life to Live is tied up in a chair and a man is standing over him yelling. Spencer asks him why he's making people disappear, and the man says "You have people to love you. I don't. I have to make people love me." He was making the people disappear and putting them in a locked room in another part of the house (I guess it's one of those old houses with 10 million different rooms). After he finishes yelling, he leaves, and a young blond girl sneaks out of that room and stands beside Spencer. Spencer turns to her and says "We have to figure out how to get out of here."

Scene 4: I walk out of my bedroom and start singing. I walk to the kitchen and the microwave clock says 11:21 am. (I don't like sleeping that late in the day. I don't care how late I go to bed, I don't like sleeping past 10 am. Once you get into lunch time, the day is over and you've missed it because you've been sleep.....). So I notice that it's after 11 and I'm upset. But I still sing and I'm singing loudly. My mom, who wasn't in the dream before, asks me to keep it down. When I walk towards her room I hear her on the phone looking for my grandmother.....

-dream over-

I wake up and go to the restroom (whenever I have dreams of urinating, I wake up feeling like my bladder is about to explode).

I don't feel unloved or like I need to make people love me, so that part I'm not even worried about. It's this whole "looking for something" theme that ran through this entire dream that has got me intrigued. I'm not one who tries to read into my dreams because they are ALWAYS crazy, but I, and other people in the dream, were looking for something. So does that mean I'm looking for something?

But at the same time - according to those 'dream experts', dreams aren't taken literally. For example, when someone dreams of fish, that is supposed to mean someone is pregnant (I don't know how people made that fish/child correlation, but whatever...). So if dreams AREN'T literal, what does 'looking for something' mean???

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