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Friday, June 02, 2006

I'm Excited

Every now and then a woman goes through these periods in life when there aren't any guys trying to date her. Sometimes these 'droughts' make her feel like something is wrong with her, make her feel lonely. So when someone does come around, and he's not worthy (read: he's not the Christian man we need to have in our lives) we let him in anyway (I'm not talking sexually, but sometimes that does occur), even though deep down we know good and well he isn't good for us.

I'll admit - I've fallen victim to this a few times... recently. They were Men of God but we weren't on the same level. But I dated them anyway because I'm 27 and have been single for the past 5 years. I'm PAST lonely. (My heart, which has a mind of its own, is longing for someone to love, but my HEAD knows God is keeping me by myself for a reason.) And I ended up getting my feelings hurt. My hurt feelings were God's way of saying "You know he's not good for you."

*I know, Jesus. I know you're working on me so I'll be ready for my husband.*

Some women don't have a good head on their shoulders or a strong relationship with God to remind them of that. Which is where Christian friendship comes into the picture.

Christians need Christian companionship to help them when they're feeling low, when they start to backtrack, or start to doubt the word of God. There are too many women out there who actually believe that all men cheat and if they don't give it up there will be another woman who will. If that's the type of man you have, that's not the type of man you NEED. When you talk to a friend about your frustrations, and the person says "Just get used to it. All men are dogs", that's not the type of person you need, either. (I had to cut that person out of my life with the quickness!) The devil just used that person to place doubt in your heart and people who are too easily used by the devil shouldn't be in your life. I'm not saying to just stop talking to those people, but one thing I have learned is that people grow and change, and sometimes your friends don't always grow and change with you. Your high school friends, who you thought would be in your life forever, aren't there anymore. Same with college. Doesn't mean anyone is bad. It just means that you are not on the same level you once were, and that's a good thing.

I was listening to some acquaintances talk about the issues they have with their men, things their men say and do even though they're in a relationship. Right then and there I prayed and said, "Jesus. I don't want a man like that." (My mom told me early to pray for a good husband.) I don't want a husband who disrespects me by going to strip clubs. I don't want a husband who believes that if I'm not giving it up as frequently as he would like, that he's entitled to go elsewhere to be satisfied. There are plenty of men (who go to church on a regular basis) who believe that it's okay to do all of the above and there are plenty of women who believe it as well and will accept that type of disrespect. This is when you need Christian friends to pull you back and give you a dose of reality. Not the reality based on the amount of men who have cheated on you and your girls or the number of men who have out of wedlock children with more than one woman - but God's reality.

I was feeling a little discouraged the other day (because I just had to cut the last guy out of my life and thank him for wasting my time), but after discussing this issue with another friend of mine, who is also aiming to have a stronger relationship with God, and she brought me back to God's reality, I felt this feeling come over me. This feeling of excitement. I KNOW God is going to send me the Christian man I have been praying for. The idea of sharing my life with a man who is of God, who treats me like a Queen, who is also striving to have a closer relationship with God - that is exhilarating. He may not walk into my life tomorrow, but I know he's coming.... and I'm excited.

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