This is Me

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Wednesday, May 17, 2006

That Tiera Marie Song hits the nail on the head!

"Are there any boys around that know how to make a girl feel, that wanna make a girl feel, make her feel good...."

One day I'm driving down the road and I hear this song and I think to myself, "She's right." Not about the sex part, but about the fact that guys these days don't know how to make females feel pretty, feel loved, feel wanted. They need to be lead around like little puppies b/c they won't take the time (or don't WANT to take the time) to learn how to court women. A male friend of mine and I also had a conversation about this.... he just doesn't understand why men don't open doors anymore, don't pull out chairs anymore, aren't affectionate. He said "There is a young couple at my church and the guy really does not know how to be a MAN for his family....yes, he works and all, but little stuff he just doesn't when they walk in church, he doesn't let her in the pew first, sits down before her, and I have even seen HER arm around should be the other way around....he should be the rock of his family...." (let's just say it was quite refreshing to have this talk with him. I believe God had us 'reunite' recently so we could have this conversation to remind me that there are a few good guys still out there.... God does that from time to time, you know.... like when we get discouraged...) We don't get compliments anymore, no surprises. Nada. All we get now is "Do you want to come over?" after like, two conversations. Um, no.....

"Do I have to tell him how to touch me
Do I have to tell him how to hold me
Do I have to tell him when to call me"

This guy I just recently STOPPED dating fell victim to the last sentence - I actually had to tell him when to call... WTH? Guys don't see what they want and go after it anymore. They expect you to court them. This may be the 21st century, but chivalry is not dead where I'm from. Instead of hearing a voice on my answering machine when I came home, I later get the excuse "Well, I didn't want to call b/c I knew you wouldn't be there b/c you're always at work." True, I'm always at work (I have two jobs) but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't TRY. You never know - I just might be home that night.....

"Do I have to tell him what to say to me every time he wanna get next to me..."

Now I know men can't read womens' minds. And I know that what's romantic to one female is not going to be the same for another. But this is where spending time with each other and getting to know one another comes into play. After spending time and paying attention to each other, you should notice little things, like the fact that I like to get "I was just thinking of you" emails/phone calls in the middle of the day (what girl doesn't?), or that I like to get dressed up, so please take me to an upscale restaurant this weekend, or that if I'm really feeling you, stopping by without calling first is okay (I have to really be feeling you for you to get away with doing this).

"Can a chick from the hood find a homie who wants to do more than spend money on me" (now I'm not a chick from the hood but go with me on this....)

Yes, according to the Word, the man is supposed to be the provider, but a lot of people only think that term is one-dimensional. In its exact definition, a provider is "a person or thing that provides something". This 'thing' that a person is providing isn't always financial. I can buy my own clothes, jewelry, etc., etc., etc. Of course a man has to be financially stable for us to be married, but I also need you to be a provider MENTALLY and EMOTIONALLY. How can you be my husband if you can't provide someone I can talk to when I'm having a bad day, someone who understands what I'm going through. I need you to provide me with someone who wants to KNOW me, will be there for me through good and bad times, who wants to make me happy. I need you to PROVIDE a best friend, a soul mate.... and that takes more than money.

"Are there any boys around that know how to make a girl feel, that wanna make a girl feel, make her feel good...."

The answer: there are plenty of boys out there.... what I'm looking for is a man.... so let me change up the song a little bit....

"Are there any MEN around that know how to make a girl feel, that wanna make a girl feel, make her feel good..."

....still waiting on my king.....


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